Bend Before You Break: Why Simone Biles Is My Ultimate Hero

All the world is a stage, and there is one player in particular we look toward: Simone Biles.

In all 24 years of her life, none of us can properly grasp the insurmountable pressure that she has faced. With the weight of the world on her shoulders, everyone was depending on that double pike with a perfect landing to bring Team USA the gold. She’s the greatest gymnast of all time, so naturally we think, “She’s Simone. Indestructible, a winner that battles through at all costs. She can handle anything.” However, I believe she did one of the bravest things I have ever witnessed. This week she shocked the world by withdrawing from the biggest competition, citing “twisties” and mental health issues.

My first reaction? Of course I was disappointed. I wanted to watch one of the greatest athletes to grace this Earth bring home the gold. My sole reason for tuning in, however, that is FURTHEST from the point. After watching her and listening to her statements, I was completely awestruck by her and moved to tears. It hit me to the core like a load of bricks. What Simone Biles has done by stepping back is bigger than any gold medal. This moves mountains and is a pivotal point in our society here’s why.

While I do not know all details of Simone Bile’s mental health history, nor have I ever experienced the twisties, I do know she just open the eyes and saved so many of us who struggle ourselves. Even though next to none of us have faced the pressure of carrying Team USA, many of us know what it is like to live with and struggle from mental health issues. Especially when your mind has been so taken over, you feel like you are breaking. Being a human being is tough, but going through the motions when symptoms hit is that much harder. Sometimes this includes sadness, but based on my experience, sometimes you brain just feels broken and you are in this murky fog. Like the worst allergies of your life pressing against your head. On top of that, everything in your body is just off and you cannot find your center. It is like operating on a bulging disk with two broken legs. Nothing can connect and it is completely out of your control. It’s tough enough to do basic tasks such as folding laundry or driving a car. Everything completely out of focus. Now imagine trying to land a floor routine with the twisties and your chemical levels are out of sorts. Not only is this another level, but could have CATASTROPHIC results. But Simone taught us its okay to step back.

Simone Biles has mentioned having depression and has also lived through significant trauma from the Larry Nassar sexual assaults. Besides the pressures of performing on the biggest world stage, this is an unbearable event to cope with. It causes MASSIVE triggers, flashbacks, can lead to nightmares and significant trust issues. Triggers from assaults can hit at any moment, and when you’re the face of a movement against sexual assault like Simone Biles, its that much harder. It is too much. And sometimes? It just hits all at once. Everything gets to the point where you are frozen, recognize an issue and must stop. Simone did exactly that and is the epitome of bravery. She could’ve risked severely injuring herself, therefore damaging her mental health and wellness even further. And for what? Our entertainment?

The decision to step back was a MASSIVE statement. It is something that some of us are much too proud to learn, myself included. I believe that this is a lesson for the future of our society. From the time we are young, we are pushed FAR too hard. We are raised with unrealistic, sometimes unattainable expectations. That no matter the pressure, no matter how much our bodies suffer we keep going. We are taught that destroying ourselves for the satisfaction of others is a badge of courage/honor, a trophy for strength. But what it truly is is toxic pride. We are admiring the wrong traits. As a society we should be trained to look out for one another, to stop ourselves before long term damage is done. Because at a certain point, our mind and bodies give out. And we never break on our own clock.

Early in our schooling we are taught to suffer in silence as these topics are considered taboo and make others uncomfortable. Pressures in our school, work, sports and other activities train us not to show our weakness, to hide our symptoms, not to address or discuss our feelings and God forbid mention if we go to a therapist. That stepping aside is the ultimate failure, cowardice if you will. We place all of the pressure on our team’s best player, give the toughest steps to the best dancer, and pile on the most pressure/work on the most experienced/skilled employee. Putting all eyes and reliance on them. Pushing them until they break. But what we must remember, we are all human beings, flawed ones at that with limits. There is a point where even stars such as Simone need to stop.

Stepping back is a terrifying to decision. I can only imagine what was going through her head. “Will my teammates hate me?,” “Am I letting my country down?,” “What will people say?”. The ludicrous amount of attention and limelight at such a young age is something only few can bear. The weight of a boulder on your back with the pressure to sprint. The list goes on. However, she knew in her heart of hearts that she was not okay. That she must tend to herself. And that is simply fine. It is okay not to be okay. There is no shame in taking care of yourself and bringing yourself back to center. We cannot be our best unless we feel our best. In order to be our best, sometimes we need to step to the side and take care of ourselves, one step at a time.

This is a profound moment and a lesson. Even the strongest, most talented people have limits. We all must stop and think,”How will this impact me long term?,” “Is this helpful for me?,” “What is my healthiest option?,” “What is most beneficial for our future?”. While most of us have not had quite the pressure of an olympic athlete, there are several other pressured circumstances impacting our mental health. These situations include dropping a class that was causing too much stress, changing majors, switching schools, dropping out of school, quitting a team and leaving a toxic job without a job lined up. At the end of the day, we have to do what’s best for us, regardless of what people may say.

Simone’s decision impacted me in particular. A reason I have not fully publicly shared, a vast reason due to immense shame. It is not the same circumstance as Simone, not even close. But a lesson that everyone is battling something. That we are never alone. Two years ago, I was in a very high stress, unhealthy circumstance that ended poorly. My body was mentally and physically broken. However I kept pushing myself to achieve and move forward. But my body was destroyed and given out. I was quiet about it for too long and could no longer hide it. My mind was chemically off balance and could no longer work in a regular 9-5 setting. This was from a paralyzing PSTD diagnosis that summer. Due to advise from physicians, I had to make a very difficult decision to take a gap year focusing on my mental health before I got back on track. That entire year was spent in intensive therapy and outpatient appointments. I had to focus on me and only me, which made me feel so alone and a failure to the entire world. Each day I spent doing intensive skill building exercises to deal with the trauma. It was exhausting and devastating, but something I had to do. I felt like a freak, so I had little to no contact with friends and avoided running into people. I still live with some shame for my decision, however Simone’s decision made me realize I wasn’t in the wrong. That sometimes things just happen and there is no shame in stepping back. That even the best athletes have to press pause. Even though my situation and hers were not NEARLY the same thing. Simone reminded me that I am not alone, that with sacrifice comes great strength. That other people go through all kinds of struggles, they simply just do not openly talk about them. And true bravery is doing whats best for yourself, even if the decision finds others in disagreement. Watching her speak in the press conference made me feel so empowered. It taught me that it is okay to take care of yourself and there is no shame in advocating for your own mental health.

We all should be like Simone. She showed that it is okay to set your boundaries. To stop when things are unsafe or too much. That it has to be YOU first and your best self first. That we OWE it to ourselves to take care of ourselves, NOT ANYONE ELSE. No matter what others say.

Thank you, Simone. Forever the GOAT and forever a hero.

#PushThrough